Things seem so much brighter here in Hong Kong Disneyland has a way of easing your stress levels! The hotel is wonderful, just like the Grand Floridian back home! We arrived via the train and it was a grand adventure. We had so many bags, so many kids but we did it and it was good! Matthew is turning out to be a great traveler. It helps that his sister are such good role models.
Matthew's behavior has changed immensely. He really gets it that he is supposed to do certain things. He very rarely yells at us at meals, he puts his napkin in his lap, mostly uses it to wipe his face (instead of his arm!) and he consistently uses a fork! He is such a quick learner.
We had a temper tantrum on the way into the park until we got past the castle and he saw the rides then he whined and yelled that he wanted to go on the rides. Dave and I agreed to keep him off of the first ride (the carousel). Matthew did not cry or yell. When we got off the ride and walked over to the second one he was very well behaved and we have not had an issue in 24 hours!
Seems that our structure and our boundaries are working. He is happy, skipping and enjoying himself as well as having appropriate behavior!
Today was the first day that I had been able to read any comments on the blog. For those of you who felt that you had to defend us THANK YOU, for those of you who so ignorantly blasted us, I feel so very sorry for you. You quite obviously do not know the first thing about children or child development. There is nothing mean nor malicious about setting boundaries and having expectations for children. You are entitled to your opinion but for your sake I hope you never get into to a situation where you must rise to the occasion because you just won't know what to do.
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone, we will go back to the park today and I will post pictures when we return!
4 comments:
Yea! I'm so glad that Disney has allowed you guys to have some fun - leave it to the Disney experience! I'm proud of you guys for sticking to your beliefs, and of Matthew and his improved behavior. Smiles - I want to see smiles in those next pictures :-)
Love and hugs to you all!
Nancy and family
Hi Tina and all- I just went back to read the comments you referred to. I just shook my head. One of the reasons I don't participate in any of the yahoo groups or blog is that there seems to be a rampant strain of judgementalism and self-righteousness that runs strong in the (unfortunately) verbal portion of the adoption community. I particulary abhor the act of making anonymous hurtful comments, especially when a family is having a difficult time and has chosen to talk about it on their OWN blog. I'm shaking my head again.
The reality is that the children at
Xiamen DO know that stealing is wrong. I mentioned to Malone, who has only been away from Xiamen for 5 months, what had happened, and he was very sad- he told a story to me about another child at Xiamen who had stolen a package of gum on an outing with the ayis. All of the other children were upset by her actions and told the ayis where she had hidden the gum. The culprit was taken back to the store and had to give the gum back and apologize. As for some of the other behaviors, from Malone's stories it seems that it's pretty much of a free-for-all among the older kids at the SWI- lots of shoving, yelling, hitting, and pinching. In addition, the ayis used corporal punishment when the children misbehaved- from his description, it sounds like there is a special paddle that is used for such matters. On the other hand, it sounds like the children were allowed to go outside to play, which is a good thing, and very different from the SWIs my three girls were from.
Anyway, I'm glad to hear that things are looking up and that Matthew is cooperating. What a relief!
I'm thinking that you may be on your way home shortly, as I remember that you will be landing in SF in about 24 hours. Here to a quick and uneventful flight home!
Will talk with you soon.
Lynn and Malone
Wishing you all a safe, comfortable, and fast travel home!
We are so happy to read today that Matthew is turning around, and that you all have been able to enjoy Hong Kong. Thank you for your honesty--please don't be discouraged by the negative comments. You and I know that others benefit so much by learning from those that have been there.
I've been following your journey all along( but not reading comments) and I am so sorry to hear that people have been posting negative judgemental comments.
I read blogs constantly as I wait to go get my little Ruby LeYun in Fuling and I can say I have admired your patience and your willingness to set (loving) boundaries, despite the tantrums. Hang in there - your efforts will pay off.
I hope you had a safe and uneventful trip home.
You and Matthew will be in my prayers as you settle into a routine back home ( not far from me, by the way - Im in Marietta Ga)
God Bless!
Vanessa
storyofyou.net
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