I have two Moms!

If you listen to your children you learn alot! The other day at dinner Matthew informed me that he was going, "To Tanner's House". Dave then jumped in to explain that Tanner's Mom had to call Matthew's Mom to work out a play date. Matthew responded, and surprised both Dave and I with, "I have two Moms." I agreed. And Matthew continued with, "I have a china mom who no want me." Again, I agreed.

Thoughtful for a moment, Matthew said, "I like that Mom."

Dave then chimed in with, "And you have a Mom who loves you with all of her heart."

Matthew continued with, "I want to call that (china) Mom, can I?" I told him that I didn't know who she was, no one knew who she was.

He then said, "Oh, why not?" I then tried to, as unemotional as possible, explain that his "china mom" left him at the hospital and didn't tell anyone who she was. Matthew's response? "OK".

He then stated, "I no want to go to Xiamen (city where he is from)"

I asked why. Matthew indicated, "They kick-a-me" and pantomimed being smacked.

I inquired if he listened and was a good boy. He told me, "no" they make me sit down and I scream.

Boy, oh boy, did that little boy shed so much light on the first months with him! He was just recreating what he did in China. However, the response he got was so MUCH different than what he got in China. He has learned so much since he has come home.

But...he has so far to go. Today we had several tantrums. We continue to have issues with Matthew not listening to what we ask him to do. He thinks that he can just do what he wants. Staying outside to play is a HUGE issue with him. He has a difficult time entertaining himself. It doesn't matter that we have EVERY toy under the sun as well as a great playground, complete with a climbing wall, for him to play with. He wants that electronic stuff!

Today I decided that I needed to set a standard for the summer (YES, Friday was the kids last day of school!). So, when Matthew came in from outside the first time, I warned him that he would lose going to the swimming pool if he didn't stay outside and play.

It wasn't 5 minutes later that I found Matthew upstairs in his room. I asked why he was there and he said, "I no want to play outside." I responded with, "then there is no swimming pool today."

Little did I know that that short statement would set off a HUGE tantrum. We had screaming, banging, crying and stomping of little boy feet. It was a replay of when Matthew first came home and did not get his way. All through today we had similar incidences when Matthew would ask if he could go to the pool. It was so hard.

But, when Dave took the girls to the pool, Matthew was fine. He just needed to be reassured that he could go the next day.

I know that there is a lesson in all of this somewhere for me. I've learned that Matthew is not easy to figure out, that at his age he has lots of higher level thinking going on and is making connections that I am not aware of until an incident happens. I can only say that God has lots more faith in my abilities as a Mom than I ever had!